Posts Tagged: "introvert"

Getting Over My Hatred For Small Talk Means I Need Better Questions

As an introvert, small talk is my kryptonite. I can literally feel the life draining out of me as I’m hit with, “What do you do for a living?” or “Did you see that Mariner’s game last night?” or “How you doing, Bro?” What usually follows are some quick answers, awkward pauses, and a drummed-up reason why I gotta leave now.

I should probably take a class on social graces.

Even among my own tribe—pastors—I fail miserably with small talk. After every conference, I think about how annoying and predictable the conversations were (How you doing, Bro? How’s the church? You guys growing?)… and then I tell myself I need to come prepared with 2 or 3 interesting things to say.

The truth is, I would love to circumvent small talk altogether and move right into some real, true, deep stuff (How has your theology changed in the past few years? What’s one thing you’re too scared to change at your church but you really wish you could? What hurts in your life right now?).

Of course, I have a weird and goofy side too. Sometimes I want to ask… Read More

Yay Internet! It’s Been a Good Week.

On Sundays I like to share what I thought was particularly good on the Internet from the week.  So here they are – from my screen to yours – a few shout-out-worthy posts…

shallow small group post

This post: Shallow Small Group Bible Study from Here’s my favorite line: “Some people say we’re superficial. But, hey, the word ‘super’ is in superficial. I mean, who doesn’t want to be… Read More

I Feel Alone

This post is a confession of sorts.

If you read my confession, it’s quite possible you’ll just think I’m strange and need help—and you wouldn’t be wrong.

Even if that is your reaction, I still I hope you’ll read the whole thing. Why? Because maybe it will stir up some compassion in your heart for strange and needy people like me.

But it’s also possible you might actually relate to what I’m saying—like, “Oh my gosh! I feel like that too!” If that’s your reaction… you’re why I’m writing this.

Have you heard that 1990 Michael W. Smith song “Place In This World?” OK, I know, it’s totally corny and he has a wicked mullet. The thing is, this song has always resonated with me… Read More

I Think It’s Time For Some New Clothes!

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Today is my birthday.

I don’t love opening gifts in front of people—mostly because I know how disappointing and flat my response is for the gift givers. On the inside, I’m doing the freak out dance like the audience in Oprah’s Favorite Things giveaway. Unfortunately, my face just has this awkward expression on it, making people wonder if I hate their gift. These are the challenges of being a painfully self-aware introvert.

I enjoy the birthday cards with that little piece of plastic in them. Even if I have to open it in front of the giver, it seems like the expectations for freak out responses are lower. A pleased looking smile and simple “thank you” is good enough. Such a relief!

Plus, I really enjoy shopping for clothes (I know men aren’t supposed to admit this, so I apologize to all my “biblical manhood,” reformed theology, Mark Driscoll-loving friends out there). My favorites are Nordstrom and H&M. Around this time of year, I’m wanting to update my wardrobe for Spring and Summer.

I’m always interested in the latest trends and colors.

I like new clothes!

Maybe you don’t like shopping and have no interest in fashion trends or the latest colors…

But, from a spiritual standpoint, you need to learn to love getting new clothes.

Here’s what I mean:

Every item of your new way of life is custom-made by the Creator, with his label on it. All the old fashions are now obsolete. Dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you… —Colossians 3.10, 12 MSG

Now, what do these new clothes look like? What are the trends and colors—the specifics?

Dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it. —Colossians 3.12-14 MSG

It’s interesting to me how these specifics of the new wardrobe God has picked out for us all have to do with our relationships and interactions with others. When you put on your new clothes, others will see you differently—you will be more attractive.

I think it’s time for some new clothes everybody!


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