How Far Do I Have To Go Before Just Admitting That I Screwed Up?

Almost 20 years ago, one of the key guys on my youth ministry team was getting credentialed as a minister. He’d graduated from college, answered the right questions, made it through the interview, and was becoming an official “Rev.”

So I got him a nice Bible with “Reverend” and his name in gold on the cover, and planned a special service to recognize this milestone.

I don’t remember all that went into this little celebration. There was probably a reception and cake. I think we invited his parents and relatives to the shindig.

What I’ll never forget, though, was my first time giving the charge to the young preacher. I knew the exact verse that needed to be read – it’s that one where Paul the Apostle is talking to young Timothy: “I charge you… preach the word of God. Be prepared, in season and out. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching.”

So the when the time came in that service for me to give the charge, I pulled out my Bible, opened it up to 1 Timothy 4.1-2 and started reading. Except something wasn’t quite right…

The words weren’t familiar. So I just kept reading out loud, thinking I’d eventually stumble upon the right verse. Here’s what I was reading:

“Now the Holy Spirit tells us clearly that in the last days some will turn away from the true faith; they will follow deceptive spirits and teachings that come from demons. These people are hypocrites and liars, and their consciences are dead.”

NOTE: at this point, I’m sweating. I know this isn’t the verse I’d picked out to read, but I wasn’t seeing the right verse anywhere, and I was sure this is where the verse I wanted was supposed to be. And I’m painfully aware that it sounds like I might be calling this young leader a deceiver, inspired by demons, a hypocrite, liar, whose conscience is dead.

So what do I do?

I keep on reading:

“They will say it is wrong to be married and wrong to eat certain foods. But God created those foods to be eaten with thanks by faithful people who know the truth. Since everything God created is good, we should not reject any of it but receive it with thanks…”

It’s here where I finally realize I’ve got the wrong Timothy. I was reading from 1 Timothy, but my verse was in 2 Timothy.

Knowing this, I awkwardly chuckle, mumble something about how “That’s the wrong verse, Um… that’s not for Alan – he’s not demonic or any of those other things, haha.”

I’m stalling for time, flipping pages like a madman, hoping to land on the correct verse this time.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of silence (10 seconds) and a lot of sweating and page flipping, I found it: “I charge you… preach the word of God. Be prepared, in season and out. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching.” —2 Timothy 4.1-2

I prayed for him, gave him his Bible with gold letters on the cover, and we all ate cake.

While some of the details are a little fuzzy in my memory, the part I know with great clarity – and will always remember – is the reading of the wrong verses. I started reading them a little tentatively (because I knew something didn’t look or sound quite right), but marched on, adding more “confidence” and gusto to my voice as I read those words about demons and hypocrites and liars.

The experience serves as a reminder and warning to me…

You don’t have to go so far before just admitting that you screwed up.

You don’t have to add fake confidence and gusto when you’re aware something doesn’t look or sound or feel quite right. 

It’s OK to say “Oops” and “Whoops” and “I’m lost” and “Somebody help me please.”

And it’s definitely good to laugh. Not just an awkward laugh – but a big, full-on, heartfelt laugh at yourself. It’s good to do that. Serious. Do more of that.

 

I am a husband, father, pastor, leader & reader. I love God, love people & love life.

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