Comments on: Open Wounds http://www.northwestleader.com/2016/open-wounds/ Mon, 28 Aug 2023 18:33:45 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.6.1 By: Brian Dolleman http://www.northwestleader.com/2016/open-wounds/#comment-164855 Brian Dolleman Fri, 17 Jun 2016 16:51:47 +0000 http://www.northwestleader.com/?p=5560#comment-164855 Cathy – I love what you’ve written here. Our Christian mask-wearing, image-maintaining, and feigned cheer is not producing good fruit. Honestly, it’s suffocating. Just yesterday, I read a social media post from a young pastor acquaintance who said something along the lines of “show me how you handle disappointment and I’ll tell you what you’re gonna make of your life…”

It took everything in me to not reply: “Well, my mom died in August and I’m still on a rollercoaster ride of emotions – sometimes I cry unexpectedly, other times I ache with a profound sense of loss, and then there are those times when I’m angry and yell swear words in my car. So this is how I’ve been dealing with my disappointment. Am I doing it right? Will I be a success in life?”

It’s as if our form of discipleship today is all about making good fakers.

Ain’t nobody got time for that.

]]> By: Cathy http://www.northwestleader.com/2016/open-wounds/#comment-164811 Cathy Thu, 16 Jun 2016 03:40:55 +0000 http://www.northwestleader.com/?p=5560#comment-164811 She nails it. The admonishments I’ve heard over and over–don’t grumble, no negative confession, just praise God and be happy/joyful–do have their roots in Scripture and can be pointed to by any of us in a well-meaning moment. But they are taken a bit too far sometimes and out of the whole context of the Word–where David, Jeremiah and Isaiah lamented and in frustration called for God to bring fire. Even Paul was more honest than we are with each other (“I wish they would emasculate themselves…”). God can handle our anger, fear, frustrations, depression, addictions and deep wounds. We just don’t know what to do with them with each other. I guard myself carefully, being well-trained through years of the Charismatic/Pentecostal experience–”have faith!” “It doesn’t happen for doubters!” “You aren’t healed because you have sin” “Depression is lack of faith–quit feeling sorry for yourself” “If you were right with God, you wouldn’t have xyz or be xyz or struggle with xyz” etc. Some of it is pride–I hate to appear weak–like not being able to run 13 miles like I intended, and “just walk 5″. And sometimes we’re anxious to tell our story and walk off before caring to hear one back. In thinking about this as I write, this posturing and lack of honesty among us could really boil down to a lack of community–our American ease with surface relationships and unease with emotion and depth. And I have no fingers to point but to myself. We ache inside but hesitate to let anyone know.

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